The other day I was walking around town, trying to find a job for this poor girl who I’m impersonating. I hope she is having a good time in the Witness Protection Program. I’m sure she will be glad to find a job and one year of homework done when she comes back.
As I was walking around town, I spotted blue footprints. These were not human foot prints, but more like a giant Scandinavian rabbit. Or perhaps Elmo. Then after a block or so, they turned into green footprints. I am highly curious and will hopefully solve this mystery soon. In the meantime, please be on the look out around LOCATION: HAPPENING for someone or something with abnormally large feet.
-H.J. Golightly